Eldercare advice for a friend in need

Between Me and My Friend Mark

It can help to talk to someone who is 'in the know' about your care taking burdens.

Mark, August 18 at 9:37am

Hey Cathleen, thanks for reaching out. I’m good, been a tough week, but I’m tough! Doing my best to take care of my mom’s affairs (she’s in a nursing home), and it’s super-stressful.

Cathleen, August 19 at 12:15pm

Sorry to hear about your mom- been there done that. I trust she’s comfortable- I’m sure the NH was the best choice for everybody.

Mark, August 19 at 3:00pm

As far as mom, if it were not for modern medical techniques she would have passed long ago. My concern now is for her quality of life, I’m not sure if she would have wanted to merely “exist” as she does now. The most frustrating thing is dealing with my brothers and sisters who’ve drawn lines in the sand. Terribly frustrating!

Cathleen , August 20 at 10:08am

You might want to have a family meeting, moderated by an independent third party, and get a family agreement about what to do and when to do it about Mom. Too bad she did not have a living will. If reason fails, make the ones who won’t let her go pay for her “simulated aliveness”. Money usually makes people wake up.

Cathleen, August 20 at 10:15am

Also, regarding your Mom…you might want to consider having yourself or someone else appointed as her guardian. Then that person can make all the decisions without the familial undermining.

Mark, August 20 at 12:24pm

Thanks. All those processes re: Mom are in the works.


About Elder Care Advice blog

Get professional elder care giving advice, advocacy, education and tips for those who care for and about the frail elderly at the ElderCareAdvice blog. We are generously sponsored by CertifiedCare.org. Most posts are written by Cathleen V. Carr, unless attributed otherwise. We welcome relevant submissions. Submit your article and by-line for publishing consideration (no promises!) to Havi at zvardit@yahoo.com, our own editor who will ensure submissions are given the best possible treatment and polish before publication, ensuring a professional level of publication. There is a nominal service fee involved ($45). Allow up to 30 days for publishing.
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